Limbo

No, I’m not talking about the awkward game from every elementary school birthday party. I’m talking about that annoying in-between stage during relationships that I seem to always find myself stuck in forever.

No one wants to have that “what are we ?” talk. But honestly why does this concept have to be so difficult?!

I feel like with every actual serious relationship I’ve had it always starts out great. There’s that fun, unknown, exciting feeling about getting to know someone new. But then, it never fails, after a certain point they all get crazy. Real estate, life plans, engagement rings, and kids names suddenly become a common topic of conversation, and I find myself running the other direction.

My guy friends tell me it’s because I’m the type you marry not the type you date. What the hell is that supposed to mean?! I’m glad that I’m the go-to after they come to their senses after ten years of single drunken decision-making. Is that even a compliment?

While I’m glad I’m not seen as one of those drunken one-night bittys I don’t see why people can’t have a relationship that lies beyond friends with benefits, but isn’t on a fast-track to marriage either. Is there no middle road?!

In college I tried the more casual approach because I truly didn’t want anything serious. I knew I wasn’t staying in Florida after graduation, and I wasn’t about to fall in love and do the long distance thing again after it blew up in my face from high school to college. The funny thing with the casual concept is that it doesn’t work either. Guys would either think they could do whatever they want (and whoever they want), or just become boring (but very cute) duds and send me flowers on the holidays to try to compensate for their lack of personality and effort. Clue to men: spending time and having fun together goes miles further than an expensive flower arrangement.

Don’t guys want someone they can go out with, stay in and watch movies with, and joke around with too? In my experience guys are more scared than girls when it comes to getting hurt and commitment. Sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith knowing you might get let down. If the risk isn’t worth the reward than I should probably not be wasting my time with you to begin with.

I’m only 22 and far from wanting the white picket fence, mini van, and slue of kids, but I’m not really trying to get treated like a warm body to sleep next to either.

The point is that I’ve had it with these extreme one-sided relationships. Perhaps this idea I’m searching for is just an absurd fantasy. If so, it looks like I’ll be single until I’m like 30 and actually ready to settle down for real. Oh well, a girl can dream. Hmph!